2/19/2024 Canton, OH – Area resident Brad Willis expressed frustration today as he scoured online job boards trying to find open congressional position postings, to no avail. Willis stated he heard about numerous Republican lawmakers retiring or not seeking reelection, including prominent committee chairs like Cathy McMorris Rodgers and Mike Gallagher.

“With all these seats opening up, you’d think there would be job postings online somewhere,” said Willis, who has no prior political or government experience. “But I’ll be darned if I can find a single listing on Indeed, LinkedIn, or even on the House of Representatives website.”

Willis insisted that if he does manage to find and apply for an open congressperson role, it must be a fully remote position with no requirement to actually show up in Washington D.C.

“I’m not going to relocate or waste time commuting for a job like this,” Willis said adamantly. “With today’s technology, there’s no reason I can’t legislate and vote from the comfort of my own home. I’ll set up a little home office, maybe get one of those electronic voting machines. It’ll be great.”

Willis said he may even start calling the offices of retiring representatives directly if he can’t find a formal application process online soon.

“I’m very persistent when I see a career opportunity,” said Willis. “If these congressmen don’t want me replacing them, they better lock their office doors.”

BY BS

The Journalist BS

Photo Credits: Microsoft Chat AI