A picture of manila folders

Trump Claims He Digitized Classified Documents To “Save Taxpayer Money”

7/30/2023 MAR-A-LAGO, FL – In a shocking announcement today, former President Donald Trump revealed that he had taken boxes of classified documents from the White House to his Mar-a-Lago residence in order to digitize them and “save taxpayer money.”

“I love all things digital, it’s tremendous,” Trump said. “I realized the government was wasting tons of money keeping all these documents in their original paper form. So I thought, what better way to cut costs than to scan everything and go paperless!”

Trump explained that he has lots of experience with documents and filing from his time running the Trump Organization. “No one knows more about filings and misplaced filings than me. I have the best folders, beautiful folders, very color coded. The Justice Department really should thank me for bringing them into the 21st century.”

The former president said that after “working night and day” with his “best scanners,” he had completed digitizing all the documents before the FBI raided Mar-a-Lago last August. “I sent the National Archives one email with everything scanned as attachments. 62,405 pages of history neatly compiled in one email. It was beautiful.”

However, Trump said he only now realized the email with the massive attachments was “undeliverable.”

“I got a bounce back saying the attachments exceeded the limit of 25MB,” Trump said. “Believe me. I never used 25 mailboxes. I was only using 1 mailbox. The official Donald J. Trump presidential mailbox. It’s all I have. It’s the best mailbox with the most documents sent securely. Not like Hilary Clinton who uses personal email. It’s really the government’s fault for using 25 mailboxes. I was doing such a great job! No other president in the history of the United States had so many mailboxes!”

The National Archives has not yet commented on whether it has indeed received any digitized documents from Trump. But the former president remains confident he’s found the solution to bulky paper records.

“In the future, all presidential records will be digital. Mark my words,” Trump said. “It’s cheaper, it saves trees, and it cuts down on clutter. I love trees. I have so many beautiful trees at all my properties. The best trees. I know trees better than anyone.”

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