6/1/2023 Austin – Scientists are freaking out as the Brain Activity Decoder (BAD), a wearable gadget, dictates embarrassing private thoughts. In a world-first, scientists developed BAD to translate brain wave thoughts into text and display them on a screen. The technology, which is still in its early stages, has the potential to revolutionize communication for people who have speaking disorders, but it also has the potential to reveal some very embarrassing and incriminating private thoughts.
In a recent experiment, researchers at the University of Texas at Austin tested the decoder on a group of volunteers who were asked to think about different topics. The decoder was able to accurately translate the volunteers’ thoughts into text, even when they were thinking about things that they would rather keep private.
For example, one volunteer was thinking about how much they hated their boss when the decoder suddenly started displaying “I hate my boss!” The volunteer was mortified, and they quickly tried to change the subject. But the decoder was too quick for them, and it continued to type out all of the volunteer’s negative thoughts about their boss.
Other volunteers had similar experiences. One volunteer was thinking about how they had cheated on their spouse, and another volunteer was thinking about how they had stolen money from their company (police were notified). The decoder was able to accurately translate all of these thoughts into text, leaving the volunteers feeling humiliated and exposed.
In “Minority Report” type fashion, a 35-year-old accountant, Jonn Hammersmith, was arrested for thinking about robbing a bank. Hammersmith claims he was just daydreaming and had no intention of carrying out the crime, but the BAD device he was wearing for the study betrayed his thoughts to the scientists monitoring him. “It’s not fair. I didn’t do anything wrong. I was just bored at work and wondered what it would be like to rob a bank. It’s not like I had a plan or a weapon or anything,” Hammersmith said in his defense.
Social media had a field day with the breached private thoughts:
- “This is BAD news for everyone. How can we trust anyone anymore? How can we keep our thoughts private? How can we live in peace?” @ScaredSh!tless
- “This is hilarious. I want to buy one of these devices and use it on my friends, family, and enemies. Imagine the fun I could have!” – @TrustMeNot
- “This is scary. What if someone uses this device to blackmail or manipulate me? What if someone uses this device to control my actions? What if someone uses this device to read my mind?” – @PrivacyRedFlags
- “This is awesome. I want to use this device to learn new things, improve my skills, and explore my subconscious. Imagine the possibilities!” – @GlassHalfFull
- “This is fake. This device is obviously a hoax or a prank. There is no way this device can actually read minds. This is just another conspiracy theory.” – @ConspiracyTheorist
The scientists who developed the BAD device say they have a moral obligation to report any illegal or harmful thoughts they detect. “We are not violating anyone’s privacy. We are only reading what people are thinking out loud in their heads. If they don’t want us to know their thoughts, they shouldn’t think them,” said Dr. Jane Fellman, the lead researcher of the project. Fellman and other scientists were surprised by the results of their experiment. They had not expected the technology to be so accurate, and they certainly had not expected it to be so revealing. They are now working on ways to improve the decoder so that it can be used more safely and ethically.
In the meantime, the scientists are urging people to be careful about what they think when they are wearing the decoder. They say that the technology could be used to spy on people or to blackmail them. What’s next, though, would it monitor people’s thoughts and punish them for thinking the socially “wrong” things as well?
The scientists’ warnings have raised some serious ethical concerns about the use of brain activity decoders. It is important to remember that thoughts are private, and they should not be shared without consent. The use of brain activity decoders to read people’s thoughts could have a chilling effect on free speech and could lead to a society where people are afraid to think for themselves.
Photo Credit: Microsoft Chat AI
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