“At first I thought it was just a mistake,” Johnson told reporters. “But then it happened again, and again. And the drinks were always different, like they were trying to experiment with different flavors.”

Johnson says she tried contacting DoorDash customer service, but was met with no answers. They have told her that there is no record of any orders being placed for her address, and that the deliveries are being made by a driver who is not on their payroll. That’s when she started to consider the possibility that the drinks were being sent by aliens.

“I mean, think about it. Who else would be interested in sending me random beverages?” Johnson asked. “It’s gotta be aliens. I just have this feeling that they’re from outer space. The drinks are always different, and they always show up at the same time every day. It’s like they know when I’m thirsty. They probably want to study our taste buds or something.”

While her theory may seem far-fetched to some, Johnson insists that she’s not crazy. “I know what I saw on my door cam,” she said. “And besides, there’s no other explanation. It’s either aliens or a very persistent prankster.”

CUFOS, the Committee for the Unidentified Flying Objects, has weighed in on the mystery deliveries. They say that they have found no evidence of alien involvement, but they are not ruling it out.

“It’s certainly possible that the drinks are from aliens,” said CUFOS spokesperson David Marler. “We’ve seen cases in the past where aliens have used food and drink to communicate with humans. But we need more evidence before we can say for sure.”

As of now, DoorDash has not publicly commented on the strange deliveries, but neighbors have not been shy.

“I think it’s probably just some prankster,” said one neighbor. “Or maybe it’s a marketing ploy for a new drink company.”

Another neighbor suggested that the drinks might be coming from a secret government program. “They’re probably trying to test out some new mind-control drug,” he said.

“She is crazy and needs help. She thinks she is special, but she is just annoying. We wish she would move out or get abducted by aliens already,” noted an anonymous neighbor. “I’m fed up with her antics. Every delivery we hear her loud excited screams and rants.  You wouldn’t believe the trash and smell of the beverages that she leaves outside her door. “

Johnson is undeterred by her neighbors’ skepticism. She is still convinced that the drinks are from aliens, and she is determined to find out the truth. She says each drink has a different message included in the delivery. Some of the messages are: “We come in peace”, “Drink this and you will see the truth”, “You are the chosen one”, and “Don’t trust CUFOS”.

For Samantha Johnson, the truth is out there, and she’s not giving up until she finds it. “I’ll keep drinking these weird drinks if it means I get to communicate with the aliens,” she said. “Who knows what they could teach us?”

Whatever the explanation, Johnson is just happy to have free drinks. “I’m not complaining,” she said. “I’m just glad that someone is thinking of me.”

By Akiva

The Journalist BS

Photo Credit: Microsoft Chat AI