4/28/2023 – New York City

A woman from New York City was arrested this morning after her social media exploits were sent to local police.  Apparently, she declared war on some squirrels that had been stealing her pillow stuffing for their nests. Mary Anderson, 52, posted on Facebook she had been suffering from chronic neck and back pain ever since the furry thieves started raiding her bedroom window. “They’re very sneaky. They wait until I’m out of the apartment or asleep, and then they rip open my pillows and take the fluff. They’ve ruined at least a dozen pillows so far,” she posted. “I can’t afford to buy new ones every week. And I can’t sleep without a pillow. It’s torture.”

Anderson detailed how she tried various methods to deter the squirrels, such as spraying repellent, installing screens, setting traps and eventually the BB gun which led to her arrest. “The squirrels are too smart and cunning,” Anderson wrote. “They always find a way to avoid my traps and get to my pillows. They even taunted me by waving their fluffy tails at me from the trees. It’s like they’re mocking me with those smug little faces and beady eyes when they run away with my stuff. They’re probably laughing at me in their cozy nests,” her post read.  “I’m taking matters into my own hands.”

Anderson went on to detail how she was not interested in compromising with the squirrels or giving up her pillows. “They started this war, and I’m going to finish it. I don’t care what animal lovers say. They’re not the ones who have to wake up every morning with a stiff neck and a sore back,” she wrote. “I’m going to get my revenge on those fluffy bastards. One way or another.”

Subsequent videos on her Facebook Reels showed in detail how she eliminated a few with her BB gun.  Those videos have since been removed by Facebook for terms violation.  New York City ordinance Section 10-121 of the Administrative Code makes killing squirrels illegal.  This section states that it is unlawful to “kill, injure, or destroy any wild animal within the city limits.” There are a few exceptions to this rule, such as when the animal is posing a threat to public safety or property. However, killing squirrels for pest control is not an exception.

The Wildlife Conservation Society and the ASPCA have issued a joint statement condemning Anderson’s actions as cruel and unnecessary. “Squirrels are an important part of the ecosystem and deserve respect and protection. They are not pests, but rather intelligent and social animals that have complex needs and behaviors,” the statement read. “We urge folks like Ms. Anderson to find a peaceful and humane solution to those problems, such as donating pillows to a local animal shelter or buying synthetic ones that are less appealing to squirrels.”

The woman is facing charges of animal cruelty and reckless endangerment. She is scheduled to appear in court next month.